White Nights 40-41

ForevaXena's FanFic . . .

White Nights

by Minerva

Disclaimer One: There is some resemblance to our favorite Warrior and Bard. They do not belong to me, but are the property of Ren Pics and that damned Oprah with her 'O' Network that only ten people have. No, no I'm not bitter. I just don't get that channel. LOL. I also don't own the folks over on ER. NBC and Crichton does. I'm just borrowing them. Everyone else is mine!

Disclaimer Two: There is a lot of violence throughout this story. It also contains instances of abuse. However, none of it is sexual. There is also the use of what can be called 'foul language.' We're all adults, and I'm sure you all can take it. This is a story that contains a growing friendship between two women that will later blossom into something more intimate. There is a lot of other stuff in between.

Dedications: To the Big Guy for the talent. To Catt as always. To my mother who will understand this story more than she ever should, and to all those women in this tragic situation. I hope this shows that you are not alone; that someone understands; and that somehow you can get out. Also lastly, to the people on the Minerva's place list. Thank you for reading this, reacting to this, and being drawn in by this. Most of all, thanks for sticking with me as this story goes on. It means a lot.

Feedback? Yeah? I'm not gonna have to beg am I? Drop me a line at Minerva

***This installment contains some rather dark, violent scenes. Be prepared.

Note: This is a day in the life type of thing of our girls. Hope you enjoy. Also, if you go to the Southwest State University website. There is a mistake or what I think is a mistake on the website. LOL Don't know what I'm talking about. You'll see.

Chapters 40 - 41

Chapter 40

The chilling water of the shower beat down against her back like life giving torrential rain. Satiated for the moment, Bobbi clenched her thighs, capturing her hand between them as she wrung every last ounce of pleasure from her throbbing sex. Slack lips parted even more, and the brunette groaned hoarsely, recalling the few minutes of bliss. Of their own volition, practiced fingers beseechingly sought out moist heated flesh, parting, stroking, and thrusting with the need to alleviate the need clenching in her stomach and thighs. Her long dormant libido awoke again kicking and screaming.

Now, as the world righted itself, and harsh breathing slowed, the doctor propped her free hand against the nippy shower wall, using it as an aid to stand upright. Made heavy by its wet weight, hair as dark as midnight slicked down Bobbi’s shoulders and back, laying like cool silk against her sensitized skin. Dark strands fell into her face dripping water into her eyes and down her cheeks. She did not bother to brush them away.

The brunette parted her thighs with a whimper, releasing her hand and a familiar musky scent. She took in a deep, long breath and let it out slowly in an attempt to clear her head. After washing her hands and other parts again, Bobbi reached and turned the shower off with a squeak. Still, she stood there for minutes more trying to gather herself, trying to hide her flushed features and the semi-satisfied look gleaming in her eyes. Will she be able to tell what I’ve been doing? Maybe it will be good if she notices and sees everything that she does to me. Feeling suddenly shy and embarrassed, Bobbi looked down at her bare feet. Unpolished toes wriggled in hello. She chuckled at her own behavior. “Whoa, it’s been a long time since I did that with someone in mind as motivation, and what motivation that was.”

Finally, Bobbi pushed her hands through her hair, wringing it the excess wetness away. Billy, if you only knew what you did for us today. With a swish, the doctor moved the shower curtain aside and reached for a towel. She rubbed her face dry and stepped out of the shower onto the fluffy blue rug. I hope you don’t help like that everyday though. I don’t think I could take it.

Bobbi dried her body quickly, groaning slightly when the soft cotton eased over her mound. After finishing, she grabbed another towel. With a simple flick of her neck, wet tresses piled into her face, and Bobbi captured a section of hair in the cloth and rubbed, making the job easier for the blow dryer. She closed her eyes and hummed, reliving the situation that sent her reeling in arousal in the first place.

The music was at a low hum out of respect for the child who played contently on the blanket a few feet from the two active figures. In turn, the television was muted. There was no need to hear Billy’s instructions. They knew them by heart. Despite her sweating and disheveled state, out of the corner of her eye, Bobbi took in each move of her companion. Damp, blonde hair clung to Michelle's forehead, in other places moisture flew from the strands freely. Full lips were pursed, set in the determined lines of her face. The petite woman’s cheeks were flushed with excitement. Increasingly toned limbs, unencumbered by the yellow t-shirt and gray sweat pants, moved freely with animated kicks and punches. It was the sexiest sight Bobbi had ever seen.

Her breath caught as her equilibrium abandoned her, leaving her graceless and clumsy. A seemingly harmless kick almost landed the doctor on her derriere. She righted herself in embarrassment, hoping the nothing was seen by green eyes, but blue eyes peered back at her from Taz' form, lying near Toby. Bobbi stared back and poked out her tongue for good measure. That's when she heard it---a sharp cry of pain. Immediately worried, Bobbi turned to her friend, seeing her clutching a hamstring. Billy was forgotten and so was her sensual haze.

"Chelle? You okay?"

The blonde grimaced, "Cramp. It hurts. I guess that I didn't stretch good enough."

Bobbi shook her head, "No sometimes it doesn't matter. It happens to everybody. Just try to walk it off."

Michelle extended her leg and proceeded to hop around. There was another cry of pain. Small hands tried their best to knead it away.

Bobbi winched in sympathy, and without a second thought lowered herself to her knees, reaching for the offending muscle. "Here let me." Larger hands pinched and massaged. Michelle closed her eyes and groaned in gratitude, as she leaned forward, placing her hands on her friend's shoulders for balance. The doctor scanned the blonde's features, willing them unscrunched. Slowly, they did as Michelle let out a contented moan. "Oh, that's good," she murmured hoarsely.

The tone behind the words enflamed Bobbi's senses. Her nose flared as she took in the blonde's scent, stronger since it mingled with sweat. Panicked by the electric tendrils of pleasure and arousal that snaked up her spine, Bobbi tried to move away, knowing that it may be too much too soon.

Small hands held her steady, making her peer into now open green with a question shining in her own eyes. "Chelle? I—" The doctor quieted as soft fingertips traveled over her face. As they had before, green eyes looked down at her filled with wonder and amazement.

Bobbi could feel inquisitive orbs studying each line and crevice in her face, touching her as if she were not real; as if she would disappear; as if she were asking why once again. With as much tenderness as she could muster, Bobbi answered the question without words, but with a slow, shaky intake of breath and an understanding, caring gleam in her eyes. She wrapped her arms around Michelle's lower back, bringing her closer. There was no protest.

Fingertips brushed over the doctor's lips as if she were praising them for the words that came out in the past and those that did not a moment ago. Cupping the sides of the brunette's face, Michelle leaned forward more, caressing the brunette's shining forehead with a kiss. Breath exploded from Bobbi's lungs as Michelle's lips trailed to her nose. The tenderness shook her, leaving her breathless. The blonde's mouth clung and moved softly to her cheeks, blessing them both with the same caress. Then, lips stilled and hovered over the doctor's mouth.

Eyes opened and met, transmitting emotion that could no longer be hidden. Michelle's lips closed the distance slowly, hinting at gentleness, but that was not the case. Mouths met in a hungry groan. Bobbi whimpered as she again became the explored. Needing an anchor, the doctor's hands closed into fist over the blonde's t-shirted back, as she waited for her own chance to map familiar territory.

Coming back to the present, Bobbi smiled crookedly. "God, I didn't know a few kisses could do that to me. I don’t ever want this to stop." Sans towels, she padded into the bedroom only to chuckle at the sight before her. Laying on the bed, Taz gave her a doggie smile in greeting.

"Hey, boy. Why aren'tcha with your mom? She still cleaning up the Peanut?" She peered at the open bedroom door and pushed it closed.

"Wuff!"

"Oh, I see, so you decided to pay me a little visit?"

"Wuff!"

"Uh huh," Bobbi murmured as she searched the chest of drawers for underwear. She pulled on the brief, red cotton panties, all the while pushing damp hair out of her eyes. She sighed and turned back to the Huskie. "You know I knew there was a full fledged woman under there, but I didn't know she would be like this."

"Wuff!"

"Noo, I'm not complaining, mind you. It's just. . .oh you wouldn't understand!"

"Wuff! Wuff!"

"Ugh, I feel like a dog in heat."

Taz growled.

"No offense."

He whimpered.

"It's just that it's so hard to keep my hands to myself, and I don't want to embarrass her in public, especially since our first date is coming up. Aargh!" She threw her hands up in the air, sending her bra across the room. "I have never been so nervous about anything in my life!" She rubbed her hands together them pushed them through her hair, grimacing at the tangles forming. "I don't remember feeling like this when I first started dating." Her frayed nerves made her giddy and itchy in her own skin. I don't remember feeling like this period, and I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. Her heart fluttered along with her stomach, and Bobbi rubbed in an attempt to make the feelings go away. "Why do I feel like I'm gonna make a big ass out of myself? I mean, this is so new, and I want it to last. There’s a lot more to this than a few touches and kisses—a lot more. I knew that from the get go." I hope she knows that. It would kill me to scare her away. I can’t see myself without her.

"Wuff!"

Bobbi paused as if waiting for the Huskie to deliver some great insight. He simply peered at her instead. "Oh, and you're not helping young man!"

Taz canted his head to the side, and his tongue lolled out of his mouth.

"Don't give me that innocent look!" She wagged a finger at him. "You understand every word I'm saying!" Realizing what she said, blue eyes rolled heavenward and a bark of laughter spilled from her lips. "I'm hopeless." Taz stood up in the bed, his tail wagging. "Don’t you say a word," the doctor chuckled.

Still half naked, she sauntered over to the bed. Sable brows drew together in thought, and her expression turned sheepish. "Um, do you think I should talk to her about this and let her know that. . .well I’m nervous as hell and a little scared? Does she seem nervous to you? About us? If I tell her maybe she'll forgive me if I do make an ass out of myself."

Taz pranced around in the bed, rustling the sheets. "Wuff!"

"Okay, maybe you're right. I should talk to her. We have all weekend." She rubbed sweaty hands together again, then groaned. If she’s kisses me like that again, I might be spending a lot of time in the shower. "We have all weekend." Dark brows drew together in contemplation. “Maybe I should buy a shower massage?"

"Wuff!"

"Smart ass!" She paused, remembering the blonde's flushed face and heavy breathing. Maybe she needs one too.

****

Michelle wiped the dripping water from her face and looked at her son indulgently as he continued to splash the water around in his small tub. A little bit of it on her did not matter. He was in a good mood today after being fussy for the last few. He’s getting so big, and I’m so glad that I get to enjoy every minute of it. She bit her lip and smiled. I’m extra glad that I have someone to share it all with. God, I’m so lucky, so very lucky. The smile turned sheepish as her face flushed with red. The blonde hid her face in her hands and cringed. I can’t believe that I’m being so bold with her. Where is this coming from? Everything from breast to thigh tingled as she recalled the ardor of the kisses they shared earlier. Her belly clenched as she replayed the pleasurable sounds that the doctor emitted. I did that? Yeah, I did that.

Michelle squeezed her naked thighs in reflex to the jumping muscles only to start slightly at the pleasure that arced up her spine. Whoa, I--. Whoa. Those stories just don't do this feeling justice. She pressed a hand to her lower stomach in an attempt to stop the sudden quivering.

There was another splash followed by a gleeful coo. Michelle wiped the water from her face and neck once more. “Thanks, sweetie. I think I needed that,” she chuckled. Toby gave his mother a toothless grin, revealing puffy pink gums. "Oh, those look bad. You're really starting to teethe aren’t you?" Pulling the fluffy green towel tighter around her, Michelle smiled back and shifted to get more comfortable on her knees. “Let’s finish getting you cleaned up, little man before we both catch a chill.” A few minutes later, the blonde clapped her hands to get the child’s full attention. Toby reached for his mother’s outstretched arms, and she lifted his slippery form out of the tub, immediately covering him with a thick towel. They headed out the bathroom door.

Back in her own bedroom now, Michelle finished pinning the cloth diaper on her squirming son. He continued to gurgle and coo. “Well, you’re in a good mood this morning, but you know what? I am too. I don’t think anything could bring me down today.”

Toby squealed in response.

Michelle fought with his flailing fist to put the white t-shirt on him. “Did you know that we get to celebrate your first Independence Day in a few days?” The blonde finagled one arm in, then the other. “Yeah, Bobbi’s taking us out.” Arms and legs sliced through the air excitedly as if he recognized the name. Michelle chuckled, “I feel the same way.” But, I’m so nervous. I don’t think it’s the being out in public thing. I think it’s being with her. . .together like we are. How am I supposed to act? I’ve never done this before. Can I touch her? She let out a shaky breath. “I want this so badly,” Michelle whispered. I deserve this. Her grin returned slowly. “We’re going out on a date, little man. Who would have thought we’d ever get to this point, huh? I never dreamed that I'd ever have a chance for a relationship. I don't think I even wanted one.” She leaned in to kiss him on the forehead. “New doors are opening up for us everyday. This is where we need to be. It’s where we need to stay. I'm pretty sure that I’ve known that for a long time.”

After dressing Toby, Michelle dispensed with her towel and walked toward the mirror, broken by her own hand, some time ago.. She stood there wishing that she could see but dreading the sight at the same time. Small hands brushed over her toned torso. I know I look different with the weight loss and everything. She peered down then fingered a pale scar. But they’re still here—a part of me. It didn’t matter before but now with Bobbi. . . Michelle closed her eyes and shuddered, wishing old pain away and willing recent happiness back. If she sees, I pray it won’t make a difference to her..

Michelle dislodged the demon of insecurity with a hard shake of her head. I believe in her. I have to, and I can't let this get me down. She sighed and took a few steps that landed her in the closet. Pulling out a well worn pair of Wrangler jeans, the blonde threw them over her shoulder as she headed for the drawers that held underwear and a plethora of t-shirts.

***

Now laying on the carpet/blanket in front of the TV with Toby for company, Michelle pushed a "Law and Order" tape in the VCR and rolled her eyes as Briscoe made a smart aleck comment about the dead man he poked at with a gloved finger. She looked up with a smile at the sound of paws moving across the hardwood floor. Taz greeted his mistress with a lick to the side of her face then promptly found his place beside Toby. Michelle rubbed his flank as he trotted away from her. The hair on the back of her neck stood up, and she jerked her head back toward the short hallway that hid the doctor's bedroom. The sight before her made the blonde smile.

With brush in hand and walking impossible slow, Bobbi made her way to the living room, muttering and scowling all the way. "Dammit I should cut this mess. It takes too long to blow dry, and I waited too freakin' long today to try." She cringed as the brush hit a snag.

Amused, Michelle chuckled at the doctor's antics. God, she is so beautiful even with her face screwed up like that.

Surprised at the sound, Bobbi scanned the room to inspect. She smirked crookedly at what she saw---green eyes sparkling back at her. Bobbi felt a glowing warmth infuse her. Sheesh, she lights up whatever room she's in. "Well aren't you a sight for sore eyes." The brunette grimaced for the hundredth time. "Ow." The doctor glared at the brush as if it sprouted a head. "Ugh, maybe I should get a haircut like yours?" A dark brow rose in question. "Because this stuff is just too much trouble, especially when it gets hot. Good thing that I at least dressed for this weird weather. . . one day hot the next cold." She whisked a hand over the red Nike t-shirt and matching shorts.

Remembering the way black silk sifted through her fingers, jade eyes widened in displeasure. "No! I would miss it."

Blue eyes shined with affection. Oh my. "You would, huh?" Bobbi's smile was teasing.

Michelle fought the urge to bite her lower lip along with the urge to hide her rapidly reddening face. She fidgeted with the edges of the star studded t-shirt but refused to look away. "I like the way it feels," the blonde whispered softly. I like everything about you.

Bobbi's eyes widened to the size of saucers. Oh myyy! "Brush it for me?" She asked just as softly.

Without a word, Michelle headed for the couch and sat down aware of three sets of eyes following her. A second later, Bobbi followed her, sitting on the floor in between splayed legs. The doctor turned slightly handing the blonde the brush. A smaller hand covered hers, sending a jolt up her arm. She brought the appendage to her mouth, gracing it with a kiss.

Hidden from view, Michelle bit her lip and grinned. I could so get used to this. I think I already am. Assaulted by the need to feel the tresses flow through her fingertips, in a bold move, Michelle forgot the brush and laced her hands deep into damp, inky blackness. What on earth am I doing? She heard the doctor's short intake of breath. Does it matter? It feels good. Her hands got lost in the dark silk. It moved like water through her fingers, and she waded through gently, mindful of the snags.

"Mmm," Bobbi groaned at the feel of fingers on her sensitized scalp. "You do like this, don't you?"

Michelle grinned loving the tingle in her fingers. "Uh huh, very much."

The brunette chuckled, "I wouldn't think of cutting it then."

A couple of minutes later, Bobbi sighed in disappointment when fingers stopped and the brushing started. Michelle moved the brush in long strokes watching, as if mesmerized, as it as it moved up and down. I think I could do this all day.

They sat in companionable silence with the murmur of the TV and the coos of the baby around them. Bobbi closed her eyes and hummed in quiet contentment. Okay, I need to tell her. Maybe she's feeling some of this too? While her jitters had dissipated with the blonde's touch, they came back with corresponding thoughts, and the flutter in her stomach returned.

Michelle let out a shaky breath as she wrestled with her own thoughts. I should tell her how I'm feeling. She sucked in another breath. I hope I say this right. "Um, about this 4th of July thing? Is there going to be a lot of people? How---"

Inwardly, Bobbi sighed in relief. She must be reading my mind. She turned slightly, peering at the blonde over her shoulder. "Um, it's at Hole-In-The-Mountain Park over in Lake Benton. It's not far from here, and yeah there's usually quite a few people. I. . .if that scares you in any way, we can go do our own thing together. Uhm, as long as I get to be with you."

For a moment, Michelle was speechless. She says the sweetest things. "No. . I, uh, it's not that. I need to do that. It's the being with you part. Uhm, Annie told me that some people are really nasty about the same-sex thing. I should have known that, especially with this being such a small town and all."

Oh, I didn't expect to hear that, but it makes sense. "Oh, well, uhm, I'm out, but I'm not really out, if that's what you mean. Since this is a small town, I think the practice would probably suffer. Uh, no one has to know about us, if that's what you're worried about. I won't embarrass you." Okay, really gotta learn to keep my hands to myself.

Michelle tried to hide her disappointment by hanging her head. " I like it when you touch me, but I understand about your business," she added quickly. "So, I guess I can't touch you either?"

Bobbi turned all the way around at the voicing of the question. Wow, she wants. . . She reached for the closest hand to her. "You mean. . .you want me to touch you?"

Michelle raised her head, peered into blue eyes and nodded.

The doctor smiled full out. "You are really something else you know that?"

Michelle grinned. "Yeah, you keep telling me that."

"Well, believe it. Uhm, if you want this, I'm game. I just hate that we have to be discreet. I hate that there's stupid people out there." She paused then chuckled, "I refuse to let it get me down though. Ah, are you as nervous as I am? I feel like I've never done this before."

Michelle blew her growing bangs out of her eyes. "Oh yeah. I've really never done this before. It's exciting, you know? Like opening an unexpected present or something—nervous but giddy. I guess this is what the girls in my high school felt when they got to go out on dates."

Bobbi frowned and brought Michelle's hand to her mouth for yet another kiss. "You and Max didn't date I take it?" Dirty bastard.

Michelle let out a derisive laugh. "I know that I don't know much about this, but aren't you supposed to like the person? I never liked them. We were just thrown together by our parents. I went along with it just to make my mother happy. I thought that maybe. . maybe she would treat me like a human being then, but you're the only one that's ever done that."

Bobbi's expression was one of conviction. "You deserve it. I know this is a first for you, but it feels that way to me too. I've dated, but this is so different. I want this to work. I never cared before." The doctor held the blonde's gaze, willing her to believe.

Michelle blushed and nodded in acknowledgement. Her heart rammed against her chest. She means it.

I am so totally mushy. C'mon move to something else. "I think you'll like the park. It's beautiful. There's green in some places and white in others with water for swimming and snow way up in the mountains for skiing, when the weathers ripe for it. You won't catch me up there. I'd probably end up with both legs broken." Bobbi chuckled. "They have camping grounds for picnics. God, there's so much food and music." She trailed off. "You'll love it. I know it."

Sounds like the adventure of a lifetime—my lifetime anyway. "I can't wait." Michelle's voice was brimming with enthusiasm. "It seems like such a long way away."

Bobbi groaned. "I know. What are we gonna do today?"

Michelle pursed her lips. "You don't have to work?"

"Nope. No appointments till Monday morning. How lucky is that?" Bobbi replied.

"Well, I was hoping you look at some colleges with me. I'm shooting for maybe Spring enrollment. I don't want to go far. Umph!" The blonde found herself wrapped in a fierce hug. Startled at first, she only hesitated a moment before returning it. "What's this for?" The blonde murmured, getting lost in the scent of the brunette's hair.

"I am so proud of you. I don't think you understand how much," Bobbi replied and squeezed Michelle harder. Woman, you are amazing. "I'd love to help you look. I promised you I would anyway. Then, we could go for some munchies and movies if you want."

"Sounds good."

"Mmm, I wish they had a movie theatre around here. There is one, but we'd have to travel a ways. We could if you wanna go?"

Michelle brightened. "Wouldn't this be like a date?"

Bobbi laughed. "Yeah, I guess it would be. We could call it a pre-date date before the real date."

Pale brows scrunched. "Huh?"

"That didn't make sense did it? Let's just call it a date then. No pressure just the three of us," Bobbi added.

"I like the sound of that." This doesn't make me so nervous. It'll be like staying at home watching a video.

"Kay, cool. Let's do it." Bobbi jumped up.

"Whoa, let's finish your hair before we do anything. It's still kind of wet. Plus there's breakfast. I can make omelets," Michelle added.

The doctor ran a hand through her tresses and smiled sheepishly. "Oh yah, forgot about that. Sounds good." She lowered herself back to the floor and waited patiently for the brushing to begin again. Michelle returned to her task with relish, brushing long, dark strands to a silky shine. They chatted incessantly and chuckled as they watched Toby try to feed his keys to Taz. It was a while later before they found their way to the den.

***

Bobbi pursed her lips as she hit the down key. She glanced at Michelle, who sat back down after checking on Toby. Green eyes looked her way, and caught staring, the doctor gave the blonde a crooked smile. "Is he okay?"

"Yeah, he's getting fussy again. I think it's his gums. They look like they've been swollen for a couple of days now."

Bobbi's eyebrows came together in a frown. "Really? I noticed he's been moody, but I didn't think to check. I'll have to keep an eye on him." She turned blue eyes on the child, who chewed on the keys with abandoned. He sat on the thick blanket with the Huskie inches from him. Oh, Peanut. Hang in there little guy. The doctor sighed and watched for a few more seconds before turning back to the blonde woman.

"You're worried about him?" Michelle asked.

"Yeah, but it's a normal thing babies his age go through. I just hope it doesn't get bad."

"Well, at least we have our own doctor around?"

Bobbi laughed. "True." She turned to look at the computer screen. "Okay, let's get started." She shifted in the swiveling chair, trying to get comfortable and closer to the blonde. The doctor scooted until their thighs touched. The brunette hummed inwardly at the warmth the generated. Very comfortable. "So, do you know what you want to study? You seem so interested in the history and languages of other places."

Michelle shrugged. "Maybe. I do want to learn more than what's online, but couldn't I go to a library and do that?"

Bobbi nodded, "That's true." She turned back to the screen. "Let's try Yahoo. This search engine sucks." She paused. "We'll check out community colleges first, but I don't think there's anything close except technical colleges. Do ya wanna learn how to weld?" The doctor asked with a chuckle.

The blonde gave her a sour face the crinkled her nose. "No, I don't think so."

"Hmm, okay let's come back to that then. I know there's a mid sized state college in Lyon's county. That's the next county over." Bobbi went silent as she typed. "Ah, here it is. This is Southwest State University." She turned toward the petite woman. "You wanna check it out?"

"Sure. Let's go to the. . .what's it called? The departments and programs first maybe something will jump out at me."

"Kay, we can do that." Bobbi clicked the mouse. "Hmm, it's not a very extensive list. Like I said, it's not a very big college."

Michelle leaned over and forward as she perused the list. Eyebrows rose. "I'm pretty sure anything doing with business isn't for me. I used to almost fall asleep in econ back in high school."

Bobbi snickered and extended a free arm across the back of the blonde's chair. "Join the club. Soulless money grubbers."

The blonde smiled as she continued to look. Hmm, there's a lot to deal with other languages maybe I will check that out. What can it hurt? "Let's go ahead and give foreign languages a look." They were silent as Bobbi clicked here and there. Michelle's face scrunched. "That's all they have? Courses that teach the languages? No history?"

Bobbi shrugged, "Guess so."

"Well, I don't want that. I can really do that in a library or even learn online."

She wants history and probably culture too. Bobbi smiled slightly when she saw Humanities. "Let's check this one out. Might be something you'll like." After another series of clicks, Bobbi beamed at the brightening of the blonde's face. "You like?"

Michelle almost brimmed with excitement. "Oh, look! They have Ancient Civilization and The Middle Ages!" Her mouth moved as she read the course descriptions. "It will be like going back in time!" The blonde reached for the doctor's forearm, squeezing it in obvious jubilation. I never thought I'd have the chance to do this. College. I could go to college, and there's no one here to stop me! "Quick! Can we look into history too? Maybe I can study them both."

Bobbi shook her head. "God, your enthusiasm is contagions. Hell, I wanna go back." The comment earned her another hard squeeze.

They peered at the history course outline. Two sets of eyebrows rose in consternation. "Wha. . ?" Bobbi went back and hit the button again. "Ohh, somebody screwed up I think. You're gonna have to call and get them to send you information."

Michelle nodded. "I thought that was kind of weird. It said the same thing as the Foreign Languages." Still bubbling with exuberance, the blonde tapped the doctor's hand. "I really like what the Humanities page said, but I guess I won't know until I actually get the books and take the course, huh?"

"Yeah, you hit the nail right on the head with that one. If you decide to major in that, there might be some courses you hate others you love. That is, once you get through the liberal arts requirements for the college."

"Uhm, what's that?" The blonde asked.

"Oh, it's just some courses you have to take to ensure you're education is more complete. It's a little bit of everything. You might find something you like better. You never know." You could find a lot to help you there, Chelle. There are a lot of women who got away like you did that are starting over. "Uhm, there's also a lot of groups you could take part of." She turned and stared into green eyes hopefully but only saw confusion.

"What do you mean?" Michelle asked warily.

Bobbi's voice softened. "Um, for women. . .for survivors rather of abusive homes."That sounds better than battered wives.

The blonde's head fell. While the guilt and shame of her situation had dissipated not too long ago, there was still something that stayed; something that made the nightmares come back, albeit sporadically. Am I ready for that? Can I tell my story to people I don't even know? I don't know. "I. . .I'm not sure. It seems like I just opened up to you yesterday. Let me think about it, okay?"

Bobbi reached out and caressed the blonde's cheek with the back of her hand. "Take all the time you need. I'll help if you decide to go." Her hand dropped away slowly, and she cleared her throat. "They, uh, more than likely have support groups for gays and lesbians too. I could go with you to those. It may help you figure out who you are." Bobbi covered the hand on her arm with her larger one. Maybe you need to slow down here, B "I'm not trying to push you or anything."

Michelle smiled slowly. You just want to take care of me. "I know you would never do that, but this group, I think I can do as long as you're there."

Bobbi leaned in gracing a cheek with a quick kiss. "You got it." She chuckled as she pulled away. "I think we should look at admissions before we get too ahead of ourselves though. You'll probably have to take some kind of college entrance exam."

"Exam?" Michelle sputtered.

"Don't worry about it. We can buy books and practice tests to prepare you."

"Oh." She paused. "That's a little scary. I wasn't allowed to study a lot in school. I kept straight B's with an occasional A. That seemed to keep my mom off my back most of the time. I had to sneak around to make up for the days of school I missed, but still—"

"I don't think you have anything to worry about." Bobbi interrupted. "You're a very intelligent woman, and now you get the chance to show it."

Michelle blushed bright red. "I don’t know—"

"I'm serious. Remember I don't say things that I don't mean." The doctor countered.

"Yeah." She makes it so easy to believe.

Bobbi clicked and clicked some more. "Mmm, looks like we don't have anything to worry about anyway. You'll be considered a non-traditional student since you're over 21."

Michelle fidgeted in her chair. "Really?! So I can go ahead and call to get that information?"

"Anytime you're ready."

"Find the number. I'll call Monday."

Bobbi chuckled. "You are really serious about this aren't you?" It's nice to see her so happy.

Michelle nodded vigorously. "What's that saying? The best revenge is living well? Well, I want my revenge, but it's not all about them. This is mainly for me. It's about finding out what I can and can't do. It's about finally being able to be me. I didn't think I'd be able to get this far, but I think I'm ready. You understand?"

"Yeah, I do totally." Bobbi's smile was sad but full of understanding.

"You do. Don't you?"

Blue eyes sparkled instead of answering further. Their gazes held sparking a familiar heat. Needing contact, Bobbi brushed the blonde's forehead with her lips.

Michelle let out a breath. "I like that."

"I do too. Very much." They kissed softly. "Mmm, now back to the subject at hand. We need to find someway to get your high school records without calling attention to where you are."

Michelle's mouth opened.

Bobbi's face brightened. "I got it!"

The blonde's mouth snapped shut, but she smiled. It is beyond great to have someone to depend on sometimes.

"We could get Shelia to get a post office box somewhere in Minneapolis with your name on it. That way when they send it, it'll still be a wild goose chase of sorts. She'll ask questions, but I won't divulge anything about you," Bobbi explained. Ah, shit. I forgot about financial aid. "Crap! We still have to deal with financial aid. They're gonna want all kinds of information." She clinched her fist and turned to her friend.

Michelle sat and watched as the brunette's brain worked. Their eyes met, but the blonde knew that the doctor was not seeing her. What am I thinking?! I have. . . "Hey! I have money. Remember?"

Bobbi shook her head. "It probably won't be enough. Besides you might need to hang on to it." She sighed. I bet she's not going to like this. She's already barely paying me for rent and food. Well, pride be damned. "I'll pay for it," the doctor uttered quietly.

Green eyes widened. I can't let her do that! No matter what's going on between us. I've been living off her from the get go. It's too much. "No."

Bobbi blew out a breath, hard enough to disturb her bangs. "I knew you were going to say that. Hear me out."

"No. I can get a job. I can—"

"Do you have your social security card and stuff like that with you?"

"Um, well no." The blonde's face lit with determination. "But couldn't we send off for copies of that too just like with the high school records?"

Smart woman. "Well. . .yeah."

Michelle smiled in triumph.

Bobbi opened her mouth to say more, but she was interrupted by Toby's cry. Needing a reprieve, the doctor stood up. "I'll get him."

With the grin still plastered on her face, the petite blonde watched her friend. Ha! Maybe I don't give myself enough credit.

Bobbi muttered to herself, but it stopped when she picked Toby up. A slight heat rolled off him. She glanced at Taz, who whimpered. He knows something's wrong. She put her lips to his forehead. The doctor frowned. "Aww, Peanut." You poor thing. The brunette balanced him in her arms to get a look at his face. It was red from crying. With a worried look frozen on her face, Bobbi turned to Michelle.

Michelle's grin died. Uh, oh. "What's wrong?" She got up and walked toward the duo.

"He has a slight temp."

The blonde put a hand to her son's cheek, then looked up at Bobbi in alarm.

"Don't worry. I bought a lot of stuff when I went shopping for him. I'm sure I got some Tylenol, and I know I got him a teething ring for the freezer. It may make those gums feel better."

Toby continued to whine.

"Here you take him. I'll go look. I'm pretty sure I put the bag of over the counter stuff for him in my bedroom. I'll hit the kitchen too."

"Well, okay. We're gonna go in the living room and get more comfortable." Michelle murmured.

"Kay. I'll be right there."

As she gathered the blanket, the blonde watched her friend leave. She kissed Toby on the forehead. "Don't worry. You're in good hands." We both are. Michelle looked down as Taz nudged her leg. His eyes were bright with worry. "It's okay, boy. We're gonna be okay," she soothed.

***

With a sigh of relief, Bobbi watched as Tobi sucked the medicine out of the dropper. She rubbed his hair back and looked up at the woman holding him. She reached up to touch a cheek. "Hey, don't look so worried. You don't have to go through this alone. I'll take him when you need a rest. He's gonna be a handful for a while."

Michelle looked away and soothed out a section of blanket. "I know, and I'm glad you're here. You don't know how glad." She swallowed. It'll be better if I tell her how I used to feel. "When he was born, I was so scared because I knew I had to do it all by myself. I prayed that he wouldn't get sick."

Bobbi scooted closer and wrapped an arm around the blonde. "Well, I'm happy that I'm here now." She reached for the frozen blue teething ring, picking it up off a paper towel. "We'll see if this gives him some relief. We're gonna have to hold it though. It's too cold for him." The doctor watched and cringed when the baby shivered as the teething ring touched his lips, but Toby sucked and then began to chew on it with obvious relief. "Ah, there you go."

Michelle watched the brunette. She always knows just what to do. Her thoughts turned to the date they'd made earlier. "I guess the date for tonight is out?"

Bobbi nodded then smiled up at her companion. "Yeah, but we still got "Law and Order," and I bet I have some DVD's you haven't seen yet. We could cuddle up on the couch or right down here on the floor if you like? We can make a whole day of it."

Michelle beamed. "Sounds goo—" She was interrupted by the sound of her own stomach growling.

Bobbi chortled, "A late lunch first, I think. I have to take Taz out too, so let me fix it. You stay here and keep an eye on the Peanut."

"Okay, I can do that."

Bobbi started to stand but stopped as she leaned down to deposit kisses on the baby and his mother. She stood all the way and motioned the Huskie with a jerk of her head. He got up immediately with his tail already wagging.

Chapter 41

The rest of the day and night was filled with laughter geared toward the television and each other, but watchful eyes remained on the groggy baby. They huddled together close on the rug in the middle of the floor arms and legs intertwined. After a quick dinner consisting of sandwiches, the night found them the same way.

Much later, Bobbi brought a hand to her mouth to cover the yawn. She slid the diaper bag over her shoulder and followed behind the blonde, who carried a sleeping Toby in her arms, and the Huskie. "Hey Chelle?" The doctor called to her friend. "I'm gonna camp out on the couch so leave your door open. That way I can hear if you guys need me." C'mon, admit it to yourself, B. You'd rather be wrapped all around her than this couch.

"Mmmkay," Michelle replied through a yawn. I almost wish this night wouldn't end. I'd rather be laying on the floor with her than in my bed alone.

They got into the blonde's bedroom and Bobbi shewed her friend away as she placed, Toby in his crib. "I got him. You just get ready for bed."

Michelle did not protest much. While the brunette's back was turned, she eased out of her jeans and crawled in the bed. Taz joined her, finding a comfortable place at the foot.

Bobbi sauntered over and smiled down at the blonde. "I think you need to be tucked in too." Michelle grinned back and waited. The doctor pulled the woman's covers up to her chin and leaned in only intending to place a quick kiss on her forehead. I'm too tired to be taking long showers tonight.

Michelle's eyes closed and she hummed at the feel of warm lips on her skin. I need more than this—something to dream about. She wound her hands into dark tresses and pulled the brunette's head down further. Bobbi's eyes widened in surprise, but her surprise soon turned to pleasure as lips met and clung for long soft minutes.

"Mmm," Bobbi said after backing away long seconds later. "I guess you needed one of those too."

Michelle let out a long breath and licked her lips in response, as if chasing the flavor the brunette left behind. "Mmm hmm. G'night," she whispered sleepily.

"Night, Chelle."

****

Bobbi was awakened some time later by Toby's wale. Disoriented, she flung the comforter off her body only to get tangled with it in her attempt to get up. "I'm comin'. Comin'," she muttered. Finally free, she ran down the hall on clumsy legs.

She pushed the door all the way open to see Michelle about to rise from the bed. She stuck out a hand to stop her. "S'okay. I got'em. Go back to sleep." Michelle did not even bother to nod as she laid back down almost immediately.

Using the hall light as a guide, Bobbi scooped the baby up from his crib. She glanced at her watch and went toward the nightstand to search for the children's Tylenol. The doctor found it and administered it. With Toby secure in her arms, Bobbi walked back and forth in front of the crib, rubbing the baby's back in an attempt to calm his cries. "Shh, I got you, Peanut." Unaware of her actions, the brunette started to hum "Greensleeves," as she trekked back and forth. She continued humming even as her sleepy mind wandered. So this what it's like to have a family. I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.

For what seemed like hours, the doctor hummed and walked until the little boy quieted. She sighed in relief, knowing that her eyes were about to droop shut any minute.

The lack of crying woke Michelle. She sat up in the bed and watched as the doctor put Toby back in his crib. That is a sight I could used to seeing. As the brunette, turned around, Michelle saw her stumble. "Hey, you okay?" She asked in a quiet murmur.

Bobbi' s head jerked up at the sound of the blonde's voice. "Huh? Oh yeah, just tired. Gonna go back to bed now."

Making her decision quickly, Michelle scooted over to the other side. "Yeah, you are. C'mere."

Sleepy blue eyes widened. "But the couch, I don't wanna impose."

"It's okay. That way we'll both be close by if he cries again." Michelle rolled mental eyes at her logic. Please say yes.

Dark brows rose. The reason sounded lame to her fuzzy mind too. "Say again?"

The blonde took in a breath. "I just want you near me." There. That wasn't that hard.

Bobbi blinked. "Oh." She paused as she shuffled toward the bed. "To sleep right?" Her words were slurred.

Michelle chuckled, refusing to be panicked. The doctor did not know what she was saying. "Yeah."

"Kay." Bobbi plopped down in the bed and wrestled with the covers, before finding a perfect spot, against the blonde's back. Without preamble, she wrapped an arm then threw a leg over her friend. "Kay," she muttered followed by some smacking noises. Finally, there was only deep breathing.

Michelle moved her hand over the appendage that covered her stomach, intertwining their fingers. The sound of the brunette's deep breaths lulled her eyes closed. "Very okay," she uttered.

**********************

Janine stared at the dark ceiling in her room until flecks of gold light appeared before her eyes. Her eyes felt gritty, swollen, and dry, irritated from the tears that seemed to have stopped for the time being. After all the stuff I said and did to other people, how can I possible think that I deserve to be happy? It doesn't matter how much I say I've changed. She pulled the blankets up to her chin. They felt scratchy against her naked skin. She knew it. She knew that I was after her the whole time. I saw it in her eyes. She hurt me on purpose. Her hands fisted, and her eyes closed.

The words and excuses that she needed to hear tumbled forth from somewhere in the back of her mind. I have to find out who she is. Maybe it's not what I think. Maybe it's early enough to. . .to stop what's between them. Bobbi has to see that we have so much in common. Why can't she see? I have to find some way to fix this, and it starts with finding out who she is. Maybe I could sneak into the house. Maybe I . . .What am I thinking?! God, this is so crazy. What else can I do? Janine let out a long sigh and turned her head to the side, seeing the bedside clock.

3:30a.m.

"I can't see her again until I know what to do." The idea made her nauseous. "I can't let her see me like this."

*****

Max Jr. lay wide awake. He peered at the trophy's, and they seemed to be staring back. He shivered in reaction, but he had no choice but to stay here. His house smelled of death. It had been easy to shove the redhead's body into the big trunk his wife left behind. It would be even easier to get rid of the woman's remains, but Max was not finished with her. Not by a long shot. Scenarios ran rampant through his mind some involving hacking flesh and others burning. You don't have to worry about it at all, dad. I'll get rid of her by myself. It'll be like she never existed. It's not hard. Not hard at all. I could do the same to Michelle easy. Max chuckled, then rolled over to fluff his pillows. Bedtime.

Beatrice lay deathly still near her husband's snoring form. Sleep eluded her these days. It had for a long time, leaving her only a couple of hours of peace each night. Her mind wandered. I can't do anything with them both here. It will be even worse tomorrow with the drinking at least they'll be watching Sunday sports. He's never hurt me bad with his friends here. Maybe I need to get him to do just that. They'll all leave afterward, and maybe I'll have enough in me to get back down to the payphone. I have to call Michelle. Her breath rattled in her chest as Max's hulking form moaned and turned toward her. The thought of more physical pain made her insides quake, but the thought of her grandson becoming like the man next to her made the decision seem simple.

Chapters 42-43

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