ForevaXena's FanFic . . .

Desire

by Kassandra

Disclaimers: I do not own, nor do I pretend to own, Xena, Gabrielle, or Argo. Renaissance Pictures / Studios USA does.

If I did own them, I'd make them do TONS more interesting things...like performing in "Grease!"...hehhehheh...take that anyway you want to... ;)

Thanks to Xavier, Magenta, and Dave just for putting up with me.

The story is copyright 2000 Kassandra.

Subtext / Maintext Disclaimers: No sex, per se (just lost more than half of you, I'm sure), but there is love between two adults of the female persuasion. If that bugs you, don't read this. If it's illegal in the state or country in which you live, move. Don't bother me about the legal system where you live...change it yourself.

Occasionally, time passes without warning and, before you know it, things between two people change. Maybe it's the fear of being close, maybe it's just too close to fear. However, without warning insecurity knocks on the door of even the bravest warrior...

"It has been two weeks since the last time I touched her, I kissed her, I felt her next to me. There has been not even one sign of her missing me," Xena thought to herself as her heart broke into tiny little pieces.

Every time she turned around, she wanted to express her love to her little companion, but was afraid and couldn't find the right words to say. "I.....I...I...cant do it!! Probably she doesn't want me. She hasn't said anything or has tried to do anything. I guess it is all over. " Warm, bitter tears falling on her cheeks.

After several minutes, the warrior wiped the teardrops away, cleared her throat and tried to act normal as she asked Gabrielle to ride Argo. "Xena you know how much I hate riding horses!" The bard replied with a tone of annoyance in her voice.

"Yea, but she is not an ordinary horse! Isn't that right, girl?" Argo moved her head in agreement, making them laugh.

"Xena you look tired. You go on, ride Argo, and I will hold the reins," replied the bard, concerned.

Xena sat on Argo, fighting the mutinous tears that threatened to roll down her cheeks. "At least we are half way to Amphipolis," the warrior thought, trying to console her self.

As the warrior drifted away in her depression, the bard was struggling with her own set of emotions. "Why hasn't she said anything? Why hasn't she kissed me? Doesn't she know how much I love her? Did I do or say something wrong?" Gabrielle's thoughts almost drove her crazy, unable to find answers to her questions. She started to play over and over the memories of the past two weeks and, between the smiles, bitter tears started to fall.

A familiar opening in the forest brought the Warrior from her day dreaming. "We'll camp here tonight...okay?" The bard moved her head in agreement, not facing the warrior.

A deep sigh escaped her as she tried to figure out why the warrior of her dreams was acting this way. "Maybe it was all a mistake. Maybe I'm not the person she thought I would be. Maybe the time wasn't right after all. maybe I'm over reacting! For the love of Zeus!" Gabrielle's heart could barely take the pain of confusion.

They slowed their pace as they approached the clearing, and it was as if they were stepping into a dream. The night sky was showing off the best diamonds in his collection, as the moon was full and proud, giving this magical setting the perfect lighting. The emerald green grass seemed to be made of silk as it glowed under the midnight sky. The cool breeze brought the aroma of wild flowers, painting mystic colors to this astonishing scene. Not to far from the bard and the warrior, the musical delight of the waterfalls gave a distinct mist to the air.

Xena dismounted Argo and started to get camp ready. Gabrielle took off into the near by forest in search of dried wood for the fire. When the bard found her self away from Xena, she fell to her knees on the floor and slowly curled into a fetal position as Her tears flowed ceaselessly down her cheeks.

"Oh Gods, can't take this pain! The unknown, the ache of loving her with more that I could ever give and have to restrain it. This fear of losing what little we have." After a while, the bard calmed her self and washed her face by the falls before Xena came looking for her. She grabbed some wood and started to walk back to the camp, hoping that Xena wouldn't notice that she had been crying.

Back at the camp, the warrior was focused on her own dilemma. "I can't cry, I can't let her see me cry, I can't let my self go, I've got to be tough." Xena was in the same unbearable anguish as the bard, but tried as best as she could to mask it.

"I'm back." Xena heard the voice of the bard behind her. wiping her tears she instructed Gabrielle where to put the wood. "Is everything ok, Xena?" asked the bard, hoping that there would be some sort of communication.

"Nothing why?" Xena responded, fearful.

"No, uh, nothing," Gabrielle responded with sadness in her eyes.

They proceeded to do their nightly routines, setting up bedrolls and cooking dinner. At the end of the supper, they sat there just staring at the fire. "I'm so tired!" Xena said, trying to break the ice.

"Come here Xena, if you want .. I can give you a massage," The bard replied. Xena, instead of relaxing, got more tense. She tried to hide the effects of the massage as much as she could. The warrior eyes were closed; imagining the bard hands moving all over her body instead of just her back and this was making her temperature rise. "I can't take any more of this sweet torture!!!!" Xena turned around and pushed Gabrielle to the floor and......

"WOW Xena! Ha, ha, ha! Stop it! Ha, ha, ha! Come on! Cut it out! Ha! ha, ha! Xena, please stop tickling me! Stop! Ha, ha, ha! My belly hurts!!!"

..Started to tickle the bard????..

"Ooooooh, my poor baby. Now..... I'll have to kiss it and make it feel better," retorted the warrior with a very evil look in her baby blue eyes.

Just the thought of feeling Xena's lips on her stomach was enough to make the bard hungry with desire. Gabrielle looked into Xena's eyes almost begging her to do so. Xena understood the message of her eyes and placed a soft quick kiss on her stomach. "Ok! There you have it. Feeling better?" Xena was still in top of Gabrielle.

"That is it?" she blushed. "I mean.....Thanks! I'm.....much better now."

Xena rolled off of Gabrielle and onto her stomach next to her, the smile never leaving her face. "Okat least I know she doesn't hate me," the warrior thought. Gabrielle began to tease Xena's back with her fingertips.

"Gabrielle, what are you doing?" In a very quiet voice, almost been able to speak.

"Ooooooh...I'm sorry Xena! I didn't mean to! I was just.........Aaaaaaah! I HAD IT!" Gabrielle got angry and stood up. As soon as she did that, Xena moved her legs and tripped Gabrielle, making her fall next to the fire.

"Ooouch XENA! Why did you.....mmmmmm! oooh Xena please...!"

"Gabrielle!"

"But I thought you........ooooohmmmmm!" Xena was in top of Gabrielle kissing her, not letting the bard talk, afraid that she might say "stop". Finally Xena released Gabrielle from her kisses and not a word came from Gabrielle's mouth. Xena's heart filled with fear, thinking that rejection was in order. However, this wasn't the case. The bard lay there, crying tears of happiness. She finally saw that the big tough warrior woman had, at last, broken down and give into her feelings. The bard slowly pulled Xena towards her and embraced her.

"Xena? Do you love me?"

"That is a very stupid question, Gabrielle," the warrior responded.

"Don't get angry with me. I just need to hear it from you. Sometimes words are necessary even though they mean nothing. They can only express to a certain level how much you love someone and only by showing it can it be complete, but I won't force you to do itI know that you are not much for talk...of course you are not like most girls anyway."

Xena understood that besides showing Gabrielle how much she loved her, she need it to hear it as well. "Gabrielle? I....I don't love you. I never did."

Gabrielle opened her eyes wide, on the verge of tears. "WHAT?!?"

Xena smiled and quickly pressed her finger to the bard's lips to keep her from talking. Xena leaned over and whispered into Gabrielle's ear, "I adore you! Without you, there is no tomorrow for me. Without you, there is no air. You are my sun, my moon, my Elysian field, my heart, my soul, my .........home."

Tears started to fall from the bard's face.

"Gabrielle, please don't cry!"

"My love! This tears are of happiness, not of sadness! I love you so much that"

Xena stop her with a kiss. She knew how much her beautiful bard loved her and desired her. As the night went on, both warrior and bard embraced each other and spoke of nothing for hours. Their embrace was as if there were no more tomorrow. Their hearts were filled with so much love. They cuddled and fell into a sweet, peaceful slumber.

I think I'll leave them alone. They need their rest and, knowing Xena, she'll kill me if I break this little love fest. I had better go and find another spot were I could sleep. ~Looking at the night~

~sigh~ Wow for sure that is a beautiful night. If only Giselle could be with me. ~smile~

The end?

Naaaaaaw I don't think so!

2 B continue or not 2 B continue that is always the question!

Kassandra the secret keeper of Xena
Please send mail for Kassandra to secret_keeper13@mailcity.com

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