ForevaXena's FanFic . . .

You Should Have . . .

by L. Crystal Michallet-Romero

Copyright © June 27, 2001 L. Crystal Michallet-Romero All Rights Reserved

Author's Note: As a way of explanation, although I have been writing since I was very young, and even though my most current writings are not fan fiction, I first began writing in earnest in the middle 80's. At that time, I wrote Star Trek Fan Fiction. I've always felt that Fan fiction was a wonderful way to keep a story alive. I feel proud that I was actively involved in Trek fiction and that I was able to see the fruition of the fan fiction writers come into full cycle with the various Trek shows both in the theatres and on t.v. I honestly believe that had it not been for the fan base, Star Trek would not have survived as long as it has. To that end, I've decided to throw my voice into the Xena world in hope that we, as fans, can keep the show alive through our endeavors in fan fiction. To that end, this is my first ever Xena Fan Fic attempt. Feedback is always welcomed!

Credits: At the top of my list is a big thank you to my wife. She doesn't realize it yet, but I've taken great liberty with her Moroccan heritage. Next, I give credit to Scotty who has passed away from his human body, but whose spirit is never really that far away. If it were not for all of his antics in the spirit world, I might not have had so many ideas to write about. And lastly, to Ambyrhawke Shadowsinger, my best friend. If it hadn't been for her walking around crying her eyes out, I might not have tried to think of some funny things to get her to laugh. Thank you for providing some of the dialogue, the editing and feedback for this story.

Disclaimers: PG-13, for content, not explicit scenes. The characters of Xena and Gabrielle are not mine. If they were, I certainly wouldn't have ended the show just yet… but that's another story! I'm only borrowing these characters and will return them better than before, I promise.

Subtext: This is a story about women loving women, so if you have a problem with it, please don't read. This is about ghosts and the after life, so if you don't believe in ghosts… you've never met Scotty. This story takes place on a ship, so if you get sea sick, take some Dramamine. Some of you may not like the twists and turns that this story takes, but please hang in there, I happen to think it's a story worth reading.

Lastly, if you are all walking around in tears, like Hawke, I hope this story brightens up your days and gives you hope that the dream is never over as long as we say it isn't over!

Feedback is always welcomed at: Crstljaguar@aol.com

Keep on trekkin in the Xenaverse,
And live long and prosper!

The ocean waves gently rocked the cabin. With a sigh, Gabrielle glanced around the room. "The length of this trip is beginning to take a toll on me," she thought as she looked at her cabin and took a mental inventory of the surroundings. She began to remember the last time that she had been traveling on a ship very similar to this. Although she knew that they were the same size, this cabin seemed so much larger than her last trip. For some reason there didn't seem to be enough room for her and Xena, let alone their bags of clothing. Now, with everything stowed away, Gabrielle found that she had room to spare.

With a sigh, she moved to the double bunk and sat on the edge. She felt down for the familiar item, and when found, she pulled her bag of clothing onto the bunk. In an absent manner she lightly touched the lid of the urn that sat nestled deep within the bag. She had not yet found a place to set the urn within her cabin. Even though she knew it was going to be a long trip, she didn't feel like bothering with it just yet.

"The last time I was here, there wasn't even room to stretch, especially with the way Xena liked to sprawl and hang on me," Gabrielle thought as her melancholy began to take hold. If she had one wish to make, it would be to have back that feeling of being cramped when she first made this journey. As a tear began to fall, she shook her head and rose to her feet.

"No time," she said out loud as she moved to the contents of her bag. In a hurried fashion she began to shuffle through her clothes and attempted to find a suitable garment to wear to dinner with the captain.

With an inward smile, Gabrielle chose a turquoise outfit and held it up. It had been so long since anyone had looked at her in that way. The open looks of desire aimed toward her had been long forgotten. Since she was with Xena, no one dared look at her in that manner. Although Xena sometimes gazed at her with desire, it was always masked in subterfuge. Like an old married couple, the open flirtation and courtship had become subdued with time. Now the interested glances she had forgotten were suddenly aimed at her, and she found it flattering.

As Gabrielle changed into the turquoise outfit, her thoughts wandered to the captain. If she had still been the little girl from Potadaeia, she might have been surprised to see a female captain. But since her travels with Xena, she had become accustomed to seeing and expecting women to have more prominent roles in life. Perhaps the open acceptance and respect Gabrielle showed toward the captain is what initially caught the
woman's attention, Gabrielle thought as she smoothed out the soft fabric.

"I can't believe you're actually going!" Xena's voice shocked her from her thoughts.

"Jeeze, Xena, the least you can do is warn me when you pop in like that!" Gabrielle scolded and negatively shook her head as she continued to dress.

With an almost childish pout, Xena stood leaning against the cabin's wall. Her eyes followed Gabrielle's every move. This action was not lost on Gabrielle who continued to act nonchalantly. As if angered by her actions, Xena crossed her arms and glanced up at the ceiling.

"You know she only wants one thing."

"Oh, and what might that be?" Gabrielle innocently asked as she cinched up her boots.

"Oh gods, Gabrielle! Can't you see that she just has one thing on her mind?" Xena huffed as she began to pace the length of the cabin.

With an impish smile, Gabrielle glanced up at Xena. As awareness crossed her mind, she stood and smiled before the ghost of her lover. "You're jealous," was her statement as she smiled.

Like a child caught sneaking a sweet, Xena's face perched into a look of amazement as she shook her head negatively. "I am NOT jealous," she attempted to proclaim her innocence.

"No? Then what are you?" Gabrielle asked in a challenging voice.

In an attempt to think of a response, Xena huffed, then waved emphatically to the bunk. "I just don't want her to get her hands on my chakram!" Xena exclaimed.

Gabrielle reached toward the bunk and removed the lethal weapon from the covers. "You mean MY chakram," she corrected mischievously.

"That's mine!" Xena proclaimed.

"Not anymore. It's mine now," Gabrielle replied as she hooked the weapon to her belt.

"But…." Xena stammered, "it was mine!"

"Yeah, well," Gabrielle turned away from Xena so that the ghost wouldn't see her smile. "You should have thought of that before you wouldn't let me bring you back to life, Warrior Princess."

Shocked by her response, Xena's face held an expression of disbelief.

"Well…." Xena stammered.

"Well what?" Gabrielle faced the taller woman, struggling to hold her stoic expression. "Are you sure it's only the chakram that you're worried about?"

At her question, Xena shook her head and turned to pace the room. "Gabrielle, you just have to be careful. I know women like that. I once was a woman like that, and let me tell you, it isn't your conversation that she's after!" Xena reiterated strongly.

"Oh, are you saying that she may be after…" Gabrielle turned away and reached for the katana on her bed. "This?" she asked.

"No, that's not what I'm saying…" Xena stammered. "It's just…"

"You're jealous," Gabrielle whispered as she leaned toward her lover. "Come on, Warrior Princess, admit it. You are jealous!" She stated as she lightly danced around her ghost lover. "You're jealous `cause she thinks I'm sexy!" Gabrielle allowed her words to sound like a child's nursery rhyme.

In the manner that Gabrielle was used to, Xena attempted to make light of the situation. "No, that's not it at all." Xena's words brought Gabrielle to stillness.

"Good, because I intend to enjoy myself," the bard played in to Xena's bluff. With an air of calmness, she looked into the small reflecting glass and ran her fingers through her short hair.

"And… how much enjoyment will you receive exactly?" Xena inquisitively asked while she seemed to be examining her fingernails.

"Oh… I don't know." Gabrielle could see the tall woman's calm expression turn frantic as she gazed down at the smaller woman. Enjoying the moment, Gabrielle straightened her garments. "I guess we'll just have to wait and see how much the captain would like to share," she teased as she turned to face Xena.

"Gabr…" Xena began to protest, but Gabrielle held her hand up.

"Xena, I'm not getting any younger, and I am still alive. I do still have needs!" she proclaimed with a suppressed smile. "And since you're not here, Warrior Princess," she tapped Xena's chest for emphasis, "I've got to find release somewhere, don't I?"

Xena pulled away from the poking finger as she said with a shrill in her voice, "Gabrielle, I'm not even buried yet! Couldn't you let some time pass first?" Xena pointed toward the urn.

"Xena, I promised you two things. One, to always keep you in my heart, and two, to not mix up your ashes with the tea." She counted each point on her finger, than added, "Now, in my defense, it was a really long trip alone!" Gabrielle knew this statement would bring out a reaction from her lover.

"Didn't I please you during the trip? I mean, what was that about?"

Smiling at the memories of those days, Gabrielle allowed her mind to remember the nights of their journey. Although Xena's body was no longer with her, their lovemaking had taken a new, different route. Gabrielle quickly discovered that spirits could give pleasure just as well as human forms could. With a shake of her head, Gabrielle pulled her mind to her current situation.

"For you information, Xena, I like to drink, too. Or have you forgotten that so soon?!" She reminded the taller warrior. At the bard's words, Xena's mouth formed a sly smile as she tilted her head slightly. A slight blush covered her ghostly complexion as she remembered the times that her smaller lover had drank to her heart's desire.

"Yeah, I know how insatiable your thirst can be," she smirked, but realizing her words, she suddenly frowned and glanced down at Gabrielle, "Oh gods, Gabrielle! I'm sorry, but…" her words were cut short by the wave of Gabrielle's hand.

"But what?" Gabrielle challenged.

"But…" Xena stammered as her mind raced to find a solution that would absolve her. "I…"

"Yeah?" Gabrielle stood with her arms crossed as she watched her lover search for words.

"But I don't want you to go with another… well, not yet anyway." Xena's harrumphed as she tried to plead her case.

"Oh really," Gabrielle was fighting down the urge to laugh at her lover's situation. "Well, Xena, you should have thought of that before you decided to keep me from bringing you back," her words took on the form of a litany.

Before anything more could be said, a gentle knock was heard against the cabin doors.

"Come in," Gabrielle said as she cast a warning glare at Xena.

"Are you alone?" the captain asked as she looked around the empty cabin. With an expression of confusion, the tall woman gazed at Gabrielle.

"Yes, quiet alone," Gabrielle attempted to smile as she watched Xena mimicking the captain's words and stance.

"Oh, I thought I heard you talking to someone," the woman's medium complexion glowed in the last rays of sunlight that shone through the
small cabin window.

"Just me," Gabrielle explained as she moved toward the woman.

"Oh…." The woman seemed genuinely confused as she glanced into Gabrielle's eyes. "Well then, if you are ready," she offered her arm to Gabrielle. Taking her cue, Gabrielle lightly placed her hand on the captain's arm as they moved from the room.

Before Xena could mimic the woman's actions, she caught the icy cold glare of Gabrielle and stood frozen. As if satisfied, Gabrielle nodded
toward her, and then closed the cabin door.

*****

The dinner had been as Gabrielle expected. With the help of the littlest crew member of the ship, the table was beautifully set with linens, silver trays and candles. Even though there seemed to be enough food for an army, the captain had assured her that they would be the only two dining in tonight. After such a long time aboard the ship, and eating food that the crew ate, she discovered that either the captain's food was wonderful, or the captain had set out a special dinner just for the evening. Like the dinner, the atmosphere was as exquisite as a captain's cabin could be, and the conversation was up to Gabrielle's standards.

When she had first boarded the ship, Gabrielle didn't know that the imposing woman understood her language. She assumed that no one on the ship could understand her, and for the first few weeks, she was aware of the captain's weakly veiled scrutiny. Gabrielle knew that the leader of the ship was maintaining her stoic distance while watching her every move. After a time, in a way that Gabrielle would have least expected it, the captain revealed that not only could she understand Gabrielle, but she could converse fluently with her.

Now, spending time alone, away from the watchful eyes of her crew, the captain revealed more of herself than Gabrielle had thought she would reveal. In her journeys with Xena, Gabrielle had become accustomed to meeting people who were different from herself. She found the varied backgrounds to be intriguing. The captain was no different. Her family was from a place called Morocco and she was born into a large family of all boys, which accounted for her fighting and negotiating abilities. Although she had known many hardships in her life, she always managed to come out on top.

As the evening progressed, Gabrielle found herself comparing the ship's captain with Xena. She stood at the same height as Xena, and her hair was just as long and black. But unlike the warrior, the captain's hair fell in loose, thick wavy curls like the mane of a lion. In contrast to Xena, the captain's complexion was a dark olive tone.

Her voice, rather than stern and controlled as Xena's could be, was soft and melodic. Each story she told was given in a vivid narration that Gabrielle could actually see in her mind's eye. The emptiness and heartache which she had felt since losing Xena seemed like a numb pain that was beginning to heal with each story from the charming captain.

"But listen to me…" the captain's sudden words brought Gabrielle to the present. "I'm talking your ear off," she exclaimed as she reached for the wine decanter and poured some dark liquid into her glass.

"No, it's alright. Your stories are so entertaining. It's almost hard to believe that someone else has experienced so much…someone other than myself and …" the blonde's words stopped as she thought of her deceased lover.

With a smile of understanding, the captain sighed as she gently patted Gabrielle's hand. "It must have been hard," the captain sympathized.

A slight gust of cold air suddenly filled the room. Gabrielle's senses were pricked as she glanced around the shadows of the cabin. Sensing the change in temperatures, the captain rose and moved to light more candles.

"I'm sorry, this old ship is faithful, but she tends to be drafty at times," she apologized as she lit another candle. Before she could move to the third one, a slight breeze blew out the first candle. Puzzled, the captain glanced at the first candle, then slightly shrugged as she moved to light it again. As the first candle lighted, the second one blew out.

Gabrielle knew the culprit behind the mysterious wind and frowned as she gazed deeper into the shadows. Sensing that Gabrielle was not amused, Xena smiled shyly as she stepped from the shadows. With only a shrug of her shoulders she waved, then moved to sit behind the captain's large desk. As Gabrielle returned her attention to the captain, she caught Xena examining the nautical instruments on the captain's desk. When the captain turned from her task, she followed Gabrielle's glance and looked at her desk.

"I know, it's atrocious," she offered as she reached a hand out toward Gabrielle. Smiling at the chivalry, Gabrielle took the offered hand and allowed herself to be lead to a nearby couch. "I'm sure you haven't known anyone as messy as I am," the captain exclaimed.

"Oh, I wouldn't bet on that!" Gabrielle replied as she cast Xena an evil grin.

The captain laughed lightly as she returned her attention to her guest. "So tell me about yourself, Gabrielle," her tone grew softer as she turned her full attention on the bard. Gabrielle felt her cheeks flush from the intense attention.

"There really isn't much to tell," she said, as the captain reached out and lightly brushed the back of her hand against Gabrielle's cheek.

Gabrielle was able to see the look of shock and anger from Xena, but when she turned to glance toward her, Xena turned briskly away and averted her attention to the maps on the desk. As if ignoring everything in the room, Xena's brows were furrowed while she innocently tapped on the top of the desk map with her forefinger. "No, I'm sure I'm not that different from the other women you know," she offered as she returned her attention to the captain.

"Nonsense," the captain's voice purred as she tenderly held Gabrielle's hand, "I've never met anyone as beautiful as you, so it must be that you are unlike anyone I've ever met," her whispered words sounded like a soft melody.

Gabrielle must have heard a million lines in her life, but this one, spoken from such a soft voice, might have been enough to sway her at a different place and time. And although she still felt the pain of losing Xena, she felt captivated by the soothing tone of this strong woman. The captain moved closer as if to whisper in her ear.

Sensing her complacency, the captain's lips lightly touched her earlobe. With her eyes closed, Gabrielle leaned into the touch. She felt herself melting into the soft kiss of the woman. She allowed herself the luxury of enjoying the softness of the woman who was laying a trail of gentle kisses from her ear, over her cheek and to her lips.

When their lips met, Gabrielle felt only a moment's hesitation before her mouth opened and allowed the kiss to linger, to explore to warmth of the captain's mouth. Gabrielle unconsciously felt her arms reach out and hold the warm body close. For a moment, she could no longer feel the cotton fabric of the captain's shirt but felt the bare arms, filled with strength, surrounding her. Her memory felt lost in the touch of her warrior lover as her heart cried out to Xena …

A loud crash brought them apart. Shocked back into reality, Gabrielle was gasping as she opened her eyes and realized that this was not her warrior princess who held her close. As she fought to regain composure, the captain rose from her seat and moved to the edge of the table. The half filled decanter now lay spilled on the cabin's floor.

"I'm sorry," the captain attempted to apologize as she removed the container. "Let me get this mess cleaned," she said as she left the room.

Gabrielle only nodded understanding as she watched the captain's retreating form. She reached up and touched her lips as the vivid memories returned. Gabrielle closed her eyes as a flood of memories crossed past her senses. Not for the first time, her heart cried out for the loss of her love - her soul mate. For a moment, she thought she was going to lose it all and break down in fits of tears again, until the sound of a clearing throat caught her attention.

"You like to make messes now?" she asked with a smile as she suppressed the onslaught of tears before looking up at Xena.

"Sorry," was all she offered as she glanced down at the spilled wine. "It wasn't a very good year anyway," Xena shrugged and moved to sit beside Gabrielle.

"So…you like her?" Xena hesitantly asked in a soft voice.

With a smile and a shake of her head, Gabrielle leaned back and looked up at the ceiling. "She's nice, but I've only known her a short time," is all she could reply for fear that her pain would surface in front of her ghost lover.

Xena seemed to take in her words as her eyes examined Gabrielle. She seemed as if she wanted to ask a question, but instead she only sighed as she glanced around the room, then turned her attention back to her. Without voicing her pain, Gabrielle found the courage to smile as she looked into the eyes of her lover.

"I love you Xena. That will never change." Her voice was soft as she held Xena's cold hand in hers. Gabrielle watched as the usually stoic warrior's eyes glazed over with moisture.

"I…" Xena began to say, but Gabrielle quieted her words with her two fingers.

"Shush, it's ok. I know." Gabrielle tenderly wiped the single tear that fell down the warrior's cheek.

Their moment of tenderness ended with the sound of footfalls and crashing containers. With the ship's stewards and the little crew member in tow, the captain gave brisk orders and watched as their evening meal was quickly picked up. With a smile that never stopped, the dark haired little girl glanced at them, then waved before taking a cloth and wiping up the wine that had seeped into the cracks of the floor. Like the whirlwind of their entrance, the scullery crew quickly left the room.

"Now, where were we," the captain's seductive voice asked as she reached down a hand of offering to Gabrielle.

"Well…" Gabrielle heard Xena say as she moved away, "I guess that's my cue to leave." She hesitated as she glanced toward Gabrielle. "I mean, I don't want to interfere with your night," the warrior shrugged as she looked from the captain to Gabrielle.

As the captain smiled at Gabrielle, she asked a wordless question by nodding toward her bunk. With this overtly sexual invitation, Xena's visibly frowned as she made a fist and her voice took on deepness. "No telling what I might do if I stay…might just end up pushing a certain captain out of her bunk, or something," she threatened, then seeing Gabrielle, she innocently smiled weakly, growled once at the captain, before smiling again at her lover. The combination of Xena's words and actions caused Gabrielle a slight chuckle. Suppressing her smile, she held the back of her hand to her lips as she looked up innocently at the captain.

"Gabrielle, I've never had a woman laugh at my offer before," the captain's voice was genuinely hurt.

Gabrielle waved away her words as she attempted to control her fit of giggles.

"I'll just be up top then," Xena explained as she moved toward the closed door. With the look of innocence, she nodded at Gabrielle, and then
disappeared through the closed door.

"I'm sorry," Gabrielle managed to control her giggles as she looked up at the captain. "It's not the offer…honestly," she said as the vision of Xena
pushing all of her suitors off of the bed crossed her mind.

"I understand," the captain's bright white smile put her at ease.

Not since Xena had Gabrielle felt so at ease in a woman's company. The thought of the closeness and of being held, being allowed to simply relax put her at ease. Returning the captain's smile, Gabrielle took the offered hand and allowed herself to be guided toward the large bed.

*****

Xena had kept her distance, as promised. She was not happy about it, but she managed to refrain from any curiosity she might be having. Rather than storming into the room and having a full out poltergeist tantrum, she stood on the deck of the ship. She watched the passing stars and the distant waves. Although she had noticed the light of the captain's cabin slowly dimming, she refrained from investigation.

This had not turned out as she had planned, Xena thought as a night watchman's humming echoed into the night. When she first decided to go to Japa, it was not her intention to get herself killed, but like most things about her, she had simply walked into it. Once in it, she couldn't think of any way to free herself and Gabrielle.

Xena knew that this was a mess that she could not get herself out of. As the sudden realization hit her, she sighed as she gazed up at the twinkling stars.

Xena realized for the first time that this was where she had made the mistake. She always tried to be in control of her life, always tried to do what was best for the people who fell victim to her actions of the past. Now she realized she had hurt the one person who meant the world to her. Although she was no longer a cold blooded killer, her nature of running headlong into danger hurt the one person who was closest to her. And like the past, her thoughtless actions had brought nothing but pain to the one woman whom she had come to know as her soulmate.

With a shake of her head, Xena stood tall and allowed the night winds to brush past her form. She knew that because Gabrielle would have joined her journey to the ends of the earth, she should have consulted with her long before deciding to run head first into the fires of Japa. Maybe then they wouldn't be in this mess. Had she simply trusted her partner's judgment, as she did during the Higuchi fires, Gabrielle might have found another way to solve this problem. Then maybe they wouldn't be here. Maybe it would be her and not a ship's captain who shared Gabrielle tonight she thought as the tears rolled silently down her cheeks.

Filled with defeat and a bit of determination she gazed at the distant moon. "If there are any gods left to hear me, I swear it will be different next time, I vow to always consult my soulmate in matters that affect our lives," she whispered. Her words brought only a gust of a wind and a slapping of the waves against the bow.

*****

Gabrielle rose long before the slumbering captain. As she opened the cabin door, she unconsciously fastened her garments as she slipped into the morning chill. At the sight of the familiar shadow leaning against the rail, she smiled as she made her way toward her ghost lover.

Xena remained silent as Gabrielle put her boots on. Gabrielle could feel her protective wall firmly in place.

"Still asleep?" Xena's voice was neutral as she spoke.

Maintaining her own control, Gabrielle sighed as she stood by her side. "Yes, like a baby," she answered as she saw Xena wince from the words.

"Good…good," Xena's voice remained controlled. "First times with you usually end up that way," Xena commented matter of factly.

Gabrielle smiled as she remembered the first time she had shared herself with Xena. It was true that both she and Xena had slept for a long time afterward, and Gabrielle wasn't all together certain if that was normal, or if she was perhaps doing something wrong. In her mind, anything that caused such fatigue must not be right, but she eventually learned that with them, their energy was drained because of the intensity of their time together.

"So… Gabrielle," Xena's voice seemed to be asking a question, but was hesitant to verbalize.

"Yes?" Gabrielle maintained her stoic expression. She crossed her arms, watched the distant waves and waited patiently for her lover to continue.

"Are you… will you be…" Xena seemed unable to find her voice.

Smiling, Gabrielle tilted her head back. She basked in the light touches of the wind. She inhaled the scent of the seas, then opened her eyes and looked up at Xena. "Will I be staying with her?"

"Well, yeah."

"No," Gabrielle shook her head as a sigh of relief was visibly released from Xena. "She's nice, and very sweet, and very compassionate…" she laughed as Xena turned away.

"Gabrielle, I don't need a full account!" Xena's anger began to seep through her voice.

"Xena," Gabrielle lightly touched her lover's arm. In a more forceful way of getting her attention, she reached up and cupped Xena's chin, forcing her to look down and face her. "Xena, nothing happened."

"Nothing happened?" she asked disbelievingly. "Really?"

"Really," Gabrielle assured. "Not that it couldn't, or wasn't about to…" she began to say with a slight laugh in her voice.

"What?!"

"But nothing happened!" Gabrielle took hold of her lover's arm. "Xena, you're my soulmate. You are the one I'm meant to be with," she assured.

"Really?" Xena asked again as if needing reassurance.

"Yes, really. And besides, Zara thinks she might know someone who can help."

"Zara?" Xena asked as she looked down at Gabrielle.

"Yes, Zara, the ship's captain," she began to explain again. "Anyway, while in bed together, she said that she might be able to help us."

"I thought you said you didn't do anything?"

"We didn't, Xena. We were in bed together, and it was then…"

"You both got into bed?"

"Well, yes… and while there…"

"And how far did you get `into bed'?"

At the sudden realization of her question, Gabrielle took on an air of nonchalance as she continued her story. "Oh, we were in bed," she nodded to Xena.

"And how familiar did you both get?"

"Very familiar, why, I even noticed the birth mark on her…"

"Never mind! I don't need to know that!" Xena cringed as she looked away. "But nothing happened?"

"No, nothing. But like I was saying, not that it couldn't because we were all over each other," she laughed as she remembered the clumsy attempts that they had both made with each other. "Mind you, I was ready to go, boy, was I ever in need, Xena! But then," she smiled up at her lover and softly touched her cheek. "Then I realized that she wasn't you, and Zara stopped and said something wasn't working out right. That's when I found myself breaking down and crying, spilling everything to her."

"You told her everything?"

"Well, just everything about the recent past. I thought she was going to have me locked up the minute we got into port, but then she said that she understood." Gabrielle laughed. "Seems there are a few people in her family who not only see ghosts, but can have conversations with them as well! So it wasn't that hard for her to grasp," she explained.

"Anyway, Xena, one of Zara's lovers might be able to help. Oh, by the way, you were right, Zara has a girl in every port. Anyway, her lover, the one I'm talking about, she's a High Priestess in Egypt. Although Zara's only seen her bring the corpse of the dead to life, she's heard from others that this woman has the magical power to bring all dead, even ashes, back to their former life! All we have to do is get to the Temple of Isis on the island of Philae before the next rising of Al-Bahr!"

Xena smiled from ear to ear as she looked down at her lover. "Say that again."

"The whole thing?" Gabrielle looked exhausted as she tried to decipher Xena's question.

"You know, say it again," Xena smugly asked as she crossed her arms and leaned back against the railing.

Understanding her request, Gabrielle sighed as the smile crossed her lips. "Yes, Xena, you were right. Zara was only after one thing. But she didn't get it," Gabrielle pointed out.

"Well that's good…for her sake, I mean," the humor rang out in Xena's voice. "So, I gather we're going to go see this lover of your captain's, and see if she can help?"

"Yep, should be there by New Years, in plenty of time before the Nile rises."

"Good, I'd like to get my body back, and then I can get my chakram back," Xena stated with finality as she crossed her arms over her chest.

"Think again, Warrior Princess. The chakram is mine," Gabrielle's voice held onto the steady tone.

"Gabrielle! That's mine, you're going to give it back to me, right?" Xena's body language held disbelief as she pleaded to Gabrielle.

In a teasing manner, Gabrielle seemed to be thinking about the question deeply before turning to her lover. With a quickness which surprised even Xena, she removed the chakram from her belt.

"This baby is mine! You're going to have to find your own, Warrior Princess."

"But…" Xena stammered, "There isn't another one like it, and the chakram has always been mine!"

"Nope," Gabrielle wagged her finger at Xena, "Not anymore. It's mine now." Gabrielle replied as she returned the weapon to her belt.

"But…" Xena stammered, "It was mine!"

"Yeah, well," Gabrielle turned away from Xena so that she wouldn't see her smile, "You should have thought of that before you wouldn't let me
bring you back to life, Warrior Princess."

Shocked by her response, Xena's face held an expression of disbelief. Not for the first time, Xena realized that this was a phrase she would
be hearing for quite some time.

"You want it, you've got to get it, Warrior Princess!" Gabrielle said as she took a fighting stance. In mock battle mode, she held out both arms to her ghost lover wiggling her fingers, "Come on, Warrior Princess, take it from me if you can!" she teased as she darted out of Xena's grasping hands. "Is that all you can do! Why, my mother's nurse maid could do better than that!" she exclaimed as she began to dance around her lover.

"Gabrielle, I'll get you, and just wait until I do!" was all Xena said as she tried to capture her illusive lover.

*****

Zara watched as the lithe blonde danced around the deck. Even though she didn't see anyone with her, she had no doubt that the Warrior Princess was with Gabrielle. With a sigh of sadness, Zara turned away from the window.

She had so much wanted to have the little blonde. In all ways, the bard was the most beautiful woman she had ever seen. But Zara knew that such a union could never take place. She was fully aware of the bond that some people shared, and she knew that no matter how badly she desired to share herself with Gabrielle, it could never be.

With a smile, Zara turned to her charts. She began to plot a new route. It would take many moons to travel, but once they reached the port of Philae, the High Priestess would be able to help both Gabrielle and her warrior lover. With only a shake of her head, she began to make the mathematical calculations as she chided herself for being a fool.

`No, it could be no other way' Zara thought. `These two were always meant to be together, and such a bond could never be broken.'

The Beginning …

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