ForevaXena's FanFic . . .

Moonstruck

by Catherine Q

Disclaimers

Copyright: Although the main character in this story might bear some physical resemblance to characters from Xena: Warrior Princess, the story was born out of my overactive imagination and I modified character traits to suit my needs. No copyright infringement implied or intended.

Love/Sex: This story depicts a loving relationship between two consenting, adult women and contains scenes of intimacy. The subtext has clearly processed into main text and might be unsuitable for really young ones or sensitive adults. I’d say PG13.

Setting: The story is set in modern day West-Virginia.

Author’s note: This is my first attempt at writing fan-fiction. English is my second language so please don’t get too upset if I left any mistakes in it. I really, *really*, would appreciate feedback so if you have a minute to spare please let me know what you think. You can reach me at:   tiggerclaws99@hotmail.com.

I can not promise regular updates, but I will do what I can.

Chapter 3

Kieran entered the dining hall later than usual. After crashing into Samantha a week ago she didn’t care to knock more people off their feet, just so that she could sit at what she considered her table and she had taken a leisure stroll through the schoolyard.

She headed for the far corner and immediately recognized the strawberry blonde sitting at her table.

“Samantha?”

Sam looked up from her food to see who was talking to her. Seeing Kieran was the last thing she expected and she almost choked on her sandwich.

“Kieran,” Sam’s throat felt very dry all of a sudden and she took a gulp from her soda. “Hi. Did you turn your paper in in time?”

Kieran looked at Samantha not sure what to say. She had expected to get yelled at or at least some annoyance. But her eyes showed nothing but warmth and friendliness.

She had put her hair up in a perfect ponytail with a few loose stands framing her face. A little mascara made her eyes appear even larger and Kieran was mesmerized. When she had seen her that night she had thought Samantha was very beautiful, but nothing could have prepared her for what she saw now. Part of her wanted to run away as fast as she could because she knew she was falling deeper and deeper, but she couldn’t.

“Erm ... yes. Look, Samantha, I don’t mean to bother you. I just came by to tell you how sorry I am for acting like a cow the other day. All that for a stupid paper. Can I make it up to you?”

She looked at Samantha with a pleading look in her eyes. It mattered a lot to her what the young woman thought of her. Kieran really wanted to be her friend, but with the way she had acted she wasn’t sure there was still a chance of that.

“Kieran, it’s fine. Do you want to sit down?”  Sam had tried to sound as casual as possible but she failed miserably. It sounded like she was very desperate for Kieran to stay and although she was, the last thing she wanted was for her to know that. She wished she could take it back and she could feel the blood rushing to her cheeks.

Kieran just stood there and gazed at the young woman incredulously. She wasn’t sure she had heard it right. Had she actually asked her to sit down with her?  It sounded too good to be true and top of it all it had sounded like as if she had really meant it and she didn’t offer out of politeness.

Sam saw the pensive expression on Kieran’s face and she feared the worst. Surely Kieran must have noticed the despair in her voice and now she was thinking of an excuse to leave her alone. For all she knew Kieran wasn’t even a lesbian. But it was too late now anyway and she waved her hand in front of Kieran’s face.

“Kieran? Aren’t you going to sit down?”

Kieran’s heart skipped a beat, this time she knew she had heard it right and she sat down facing Samantha.

A moment of silence passed between them and Kieran started to get nervous.

“Did ... Did I hurt you?” She was pretty sure she hadn’t hurt the young woman too badly, but it was the first thing that had entered her mind.

“No, I’m fine. Really. Don’t worry about that.”

“Good,” Kieran said. She had never been one for talking and now she wished she hadn’t sat down. The silence between them frightened her.  Samantha had seemed very talkative but now she remained quiet and Kieran wondered if maybe she still was angry with her. She wanted to make it all right but she didn’t know how. But she knew that if she didn’t come up with something soon they might never get close.

“So, how’s your horse? Or isn’t it yours?”

Samantha had a thousand questions she wanted to ask Kieran but now that she actually had the chance she found herself at a loss for words. She could sense the silence made the other woman uncomfortable and she wanted to be her friend but she couldn’t find the right things to say.

“She was a little scared, but she’s fine really.” And Sam told Kieran how she had gotten the horse when it had been only 2 years old. It had been her 12th birthday and her parents had taken her into the barn and shown her this beautiful palomino between all the cows. Sam had always enjoyed riding and she wanted a horse of her own, but she knew her parents thought she wouldn’t be able to manage it with her schoolwork, so never asked for one. She had been so happy she had cried for a long time.

Sam called her Moonstruck and spent hours brushing her and walking her until it was time for her to get used to the saddle. Her parents spent a lot of time abroad so most of the time she hung out with George. Although the old butler didn’t have the strength to help her with the powerful young horse anymore, he was always watching their every move to make sure they were okay. Sam liked having him around. Even though he was old now she knew a lot about horses and he would tell Sam what to do if the horse didn’t react the way she wanted it to.

But although Moon was very powerful she never wanted to hurt Sam; she liked her. She always had this sweet scent of apple shampoo and often she brought Moon real apples. By the time she was used to the saddle Sam would take her out for a ride as often as she could and they entered little competitions.

Kieran had no interest in horses really. She thought they were nice from a distance, up close they scared her. But she listened eagerly to Samantha’s endless chatter. She really wanted to get to know her better.

All of a sudden the bell rang breaking the stream of words flowing from the redhead’s mouth. She snapped her mouth shut and a deep crimson blush spread over her face.

“I’m sorry,” she pressed her lips close together, “I.. sometimes I just keep rambling on.”

Kieran wished break wasn’t over yet. She enjoyed listening to the soft voice and hadn’t minded at all that Samantha did most of the talking. She laughed and said, “I don’t mind at all. I am not that talkative. I like talking with you.”

Sam knew Kieran was serious and she was glad, there was so much more she had wanted to tell her, wanted to ask her, before the bell cut her off.  She really wanted to talk to her some more but she wasn’t sure how to ask her.

“I’ve got a dressage competition this afternoon. My classes should be over by 2PM and I don’t need to prepare  until at 3PM. Maybe we could meet ?

Sam couldn’t believe what she had just blurted out. She didn’t really know Kieran very well and now she had asked her to meet up again when they had just spent the break together. Not that she didn’t want to meet up with her – she would love too – but what would Kieran think of her now?

***

Kieran had been sitting in the dining hall since her last class ended. The large clock on the wall said 1:55PM and she could feel her heart pounding against her chest. Samantha would be there before too long and she started to grow restless. What if they wouldn’t get along as they had this afternoon? What if she had forgotten she’d meet Kieran there? She got up and started pacing. There were a few people in the dining hall, but she didn’t know any of them. They were preoccupied with their own business anyway so no chance of any distraction there.

It was a little past 2PM and still no sign of Samantha. Kieran had sat down again and her long lean fingers were tapping on the table. She hadn’t thought of her as the type that doesn’t show up without a good reason. But she was only a few minutes late and it would probably take her some time to walk here, Kieran thought. Kieran needed an excuse, any excuse. She just had to show up.

“Hey”

Kieran recognized that voice anywhere. Sam had walked up to her from behind and she turned around to face her.

“I hope I didn’t keep you waiting. I had some stuff in my locker I needed to pick up first.”

“No, I just got here myself,” It was out before she realized it. She could have told her she had been there for an hour. But deep down she knew she lied because she didn’t want Samantha to know that she more than liked her. Hell, she didn’t even want to know that herself. She wasn’t ready for that.

Sam studied Kieran’s face closely. Somehow it had sounded as if she had already been here for some time, but she couldn’t make it out and it didn’t really matter to her so she continued talking.

“Sorry, about lunch, sometimes…”, she made a fluttering gesture with her hands and raised her eyebrows.

Kieran grabbed hold of Sam’s hands and smiled. “Samantha, it is fine! Honest.”

Sam was a little surprised Kieran had just taken hold of her hands but it felt very right. Mandy did the same thing, but with Kieran it felt different. “Just call me Sam, all my friends do.”

A huge smile framed Kieran’s face. So we are friends huh?. She knew she must look like an idiot with that big grin on her face but she didn’t care. Reluctantly she let go off Sam’s hands and slowly they started down the road.

They turned off the main road onto a more private sandy road that led them right through the middle of a dense forest with old mossy trees that swayed gently in the breeze. Their leaves were already starting to change color as autumn had made her appearance.

Sam liked forests. A lot of people were afraid to go in too deep but ever since she could remember she had wondered off in the woods. She had come across many of the animals that her friends were scared of, but she had learned a long time ago they didn’t hurt her if she just left them in peace.

A look at Kieran told her she too enjoyed the peacefulness. It had been a long time since Kieran had last wandered off in the woods. She breathed in the green scent of damp ground and sighed contently.

Up above a few birds were singing, but other than that and the sound of them treading on old branches the whole world seemed to have turned silent.

The silence that had made Sam nervous earlier now felt like a comforting blanket and she wondered if her friend felt the same way. She remembered what she had wanted to ask earlier and decided to give it a try.

“So, tell me about you”

Kieran closed her eyes briefly. She had expected that question but it scared her. Her past was something she wasn’t ready to share yet and she was afraid to young woman would ask about it.

“I’m 27. I was born and raised in California. I moved here to attend the university. Up till two weeks ago I used to work during the day and take night classes, but I couldn’t keep that up anymore.”

It was only a short answer, but it would do. Kieran just hoped she would leave it at that.

Sam sensed she had breached upon a sensitive subject and she didn’t want her new friend to feel threatened so she decided to play it safe for the time being.

“What’s your major?” Sam asked.

Kieran released the breath she had been holding. “I’m in the pre-law program. I really enjoy it so far. Eventually, I want to specialize in criminology. You see, I don’t want to be the one who just passes judgment, I want to know why and how to prevent people from making the same mistakes.”

“Wow, you must be pretty good,”

Kieran just looked at the leaves that had fallen from the trees already. She didn’t know what to say.

Sam was impressed. She knew how hard it was to get into the pre-law program and how demanding the classes were. There was so much more she wanted to ask her. Kieran’s voice had shown so much determination and so much passion. But she knew she didn’t have time for that.

They had reached the open road from where she could get to the riding school easily.

“I wish I could stay around a little longer, but I need to start preparing for the competition.”

Kieran could tell she really regretted she had to leave and Kieran too wished she could have stayed a little longer. She wanted to ask her if she could stay for a bit, but she knew how much riding meant to Sam and she didn’t want to interfere with her riding.

“I wish you could stay too, but I know you have to go,” Kieran fell silent. “Good luck, Sam! I have seen it on TV once and it looked very hard.”

“You have seen it on TV?” Sam frowned. She had never expected Kieran to watch something like that. But then again, there was a lot she didn’t know about her.

Kieran laughed, it was obvious how much her reply had surprised Sam. “Yes, I don’t mean I watch it a lot, but sometimes I stumble across it. It looks very impressive. Really I do like horses, I am just not to fond of them up close.”

***

“Thank you Suzan. Give it up for Suzan people!”

Kieran applauded but wasn’t impressed by the girl’s performance. She was still very young and obviously a gifted horsewoman, but the kür had been tame in comparison to the other competitors.

The scent of horses and beer filled her nostrils and she inhaled deeply. The area around the riding-track was filled with cheerful people laughing and talking. Kieran could feel the bag of the woman behind her prod in her back but it didn’t bother her.               

As they announced the next rider the crowd stopped talking and you could hear a needle drop.

Everyone moved closer to the track, eager to see the next rider. The bag pressed harder against Kieran’s back as it’s owner tried to get a better glimpse of the rider. Kieran hardly noticed. She couldn’t wait to see her friend. The previous riders had displayed a lot of skill and she wondered if Sam was as good as the others.      

The woman in the riding-track was the best by far and Kieran wondered what she did at a competition like this one. She could hear the woman behind her whisper to her husband but she could only make out a few words and she strained her ears to pick up some more.

“new horse … no official entry … getting used to crowds … famous”

Ah, so she’s no competition for Sam. Kieran felt relieved, without fully realized she really wanted her friend to take home the first prize.

“Ladies and gentlemen, Miss Ankie van Grunsven, here with her new horse Exotic Bonfire. 
    Next rider up Miss Samantha Hayes riding Moonstruck Promise Z, 10-year-old mare, owned by Miss Brown also.
    Music for the kür The Changing Seasons’ by  ‘Davie Stevinson’.”

Kieran wrestled herself to the front until she was leaning against the well-kept fence. She heard the indignant mumbles behind her, but she just had to be as close as she could get. The big entrance doors were opened and a large golden horse entered the ring. Kieran had never seen a horse like that. There was something majestic to the way she moved and her fur shimmered in the weak autumn sun. Sam had braided the manes and put them up showing off the powerful neck. The bright white saddlecloth and the black saddle were the same colors Sam was wearing.

The first notes sounded across the immense riding-track and Kieran marveled at the ease with which Sam seemed to control her horse. They came to halt not far from Kieran as they greeted the judges and Kieran swore she saw Sam wink at her.  She was so glad she had taken Sam up on her invitation to come watch her ride.

The sound of Spring filled the area and the mare danced across the ring as light as a feather. Concentration was written on Sam’s face as she tried to make every move perfect. Clods of white foamy spittle covered the mare’s chest and legs and because it had been that way with Ankie Kieran assumed that was a good thing. Although it did look pretty gross to her.

Kieran could hear the people around her whisper about the young rider who had captured their attention as well. And they were absolutely right; she was one of the best riders so far. Rider and horse formed a perfect unit.

It wasn’t hard to make out which season Sam was depicting and Kieran felt disappointed as she recognized the sound of Winter. Winter started off slowly, slow fixed movements, until suddenly the music accelerated. Sam had urged Moon to a slow canter and as she crossed the riding-track from one corner to another she made her change feet along with the rhythm, making it look like as if horse and rider were frozen in time.

As the last tones died out softly a feeling of disappointment went through the audience followed by a round of applause. Kieran cheered wildly and jumped up and down excitedly. For a minute it had felt like she was out there in the ring with Sam.

Kieran never took her eyes off Sam and when she rode by on the way to the exit their eyes met briefly, leaving Kieran with a funny feeling in the pit of her stomach.

“Thank you Samantha… “

But Kieran didn’t hear any of it, she was already working her way through to crowd to get to the cooling down track.

***

Kieran hung on the fence of the cooling down area watching Sam and Moon.

She was still out of breath from running all the way, but when she had spotted Sam and Moon she didn’t feel her raw throat anymore. It wasn’t a kür anymore but still she couldn’t take her eyes away.

Sam smiled as her eyes found Kieran and she waved at her friend. But Kieran still leaned motionless on the fence without showing any signs of recognition. She drove up close leaving some space between the fence and the horse so that Moon wouldn’t scare Kieran.

“What do you think?”

Kieran just stared at the big horse nose and remained quiet. She hadn’t notice Sam had spoken to her.

She was lost deep in thought when she heard a familiar voice.

“Earth to Kieran! You still here girl?” Sam had difficulty not to laugh at the drowsy expression on Kieran’s face. If she hadn’t known any better she would have thought she had just woken up.

“I’m here, what did you say?”

Slowly Sam repeated her question and she looked at Kieran inquisitively. Somehow Kieran’s opinion mattered more to her than that of the judges.

A dreamy smile softened Kieran features and she said, “I think you are beautiful Sam”

Sam couldn’t believe her ears. Surely Kieran hadn’t just said that. Or had she?

Her palms turned sweaty and her throat felt dry. An endless train of thoughts went through her head.

How she had longed to hear that there was a chance the older woman would return her affection. But she needed to be sure.

Sam swallowed and hesitated before she spoke. She wanted to ask her outright, but if she was wrong she might lose her friend.

“I-I,” Sam turned an even deeper shade of red. She had stopped stuttering a long time ago, but occasionally she would fall back in her old habit, “Could you s-say that again?”

Kieran had realized her mistake the second the words had left her mouth but it had been too late. She didn’t dare to look up and see the disgust in Sam’s eyes so she just looked at the ground and racked her brain trying to come up with something to say.

“The kür it was beautiful” She tried to sound as if that was what she had said the first time and slowly she looked up until her eyes met Sam’s. There was sadness in her eyes that hadn’t been there before and Kieran felt sadness invade her mind as well. She had really blown it this time.

“Thanks. Do you want to help me groom Moon?”

Confusion took possession of Kieran’s every thought. She had seen the disappointment in Sam’s eyes, yet now she was asking her to help her groom?  Sam’s cheeks had gotten so red that it looked like she was very angry with her. Wasn’t she disgusted with her? Kieran felt like she didn’t know anything anymore. She knew her friend was waiting for a reply so she decided to just go for it.

“Yes” Kieran felt relieve wash over here body as such noticed Sam was smiling again. So she actually wanted her to come help and she wasn’t disgusted. Maybe Sam hadn’t heard what she said after-all.

“NO!” Kieran exclaimed, a look of panic on her face.

Sam looked at her clearly upset. It had been going so well, until Kieran had yelled no for no apparent reason. She had thought Kieran really like her. Maybe even the way she like Kieran, the way she more than liked her. And now this.

“I mean,” Kieran said, “I would love too, but I agreed to meet my study counselor in 30 minutes. I should really get going. Thanks for a wonderful afternoon.”

Sam still didn’t look convinced. Every time she thought they were starting to reach a new stage Kieran would back off. Sure she looked like as if she regretted it, but what good was that?

“Maybe I can come some other day,” Kieran said shyly, “I mean, if that’s okay with you?” And she looked hopeful at Sam.

Oh god, Sam, what am I doing? I *really* like you. But sooner or later you’ll find out about me and then I will be alone again. I can’t do that. I need you. Maybe it’s best if I just say I am allergic to hay or something.

Kieran hadn’t been able to gather up enough courage to tell her friend about her preference yet and now it was too late. She couldn’t risk loosing her anymore. In fact she couldn’t even tell her no anymore. Kieran didn’t realize it yet but she had fallen had over heels in love with the small redhead.

Chapter 4

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